A range of adversities contributed to a low sense of belonging and self-worth and almost made me not reach 13. Standing outside my window and wish I could say that was where change happened, it didn't. It came at the age of 32, this was a big turning point in my life. Personal development, therapeutic support and the understanding of mental health was not something I grew up in.
Change started at the time of learning about PTSD, as a student I was working with had been diagnosed. The more I learnt, all I saw was a mirror of my own life and others around me. With my perspective and ideologies shaken, I did not know where to start or what to work on first. At that point, all I knew was the old way was no longer an option.
8 Years of making significant change from habits, work, and personal goals' life looks different. I work and learn in areas that allow me to embrace my adversities and navigate challenges in health ways, and empower others to connect to the very thing they try to avoid.
Growing up, I had few memories of my biological mother. In 2023, I learned that I was classified as a child at risk. I was always aware that social services were involved in my life, which, in many ways, helped me connect with the individuals I worked with in social care and education.
My biological mother struggled with severe mental health issues and substance abuse, which made it impossible for her to provide a stable home for any of her children.
I used to call my traumatic experiences simply "life" because I lacked the words to describe them. Now, although it's still my life, I thrive by embracing healthy habits and demonstrating what true wellness looks like.
At the end of 2023, I faced a severe health crisis when my appendix burst, leading to sepsis and a perforated bowel. This resulted in me having a disability, and I now live with an ostomy. I have navigated this challenging journey by staying in tune with my mind and body, allowing healing to take its natural course.
Living with an ostomy & navigating life with a disability
I am beyond grateful to have my life, this experience with all the other adversities I have faced now allow me to speak about how you move from a survival state to a thriving state. I made changes that were outside my culture, environment and perspectives. What came from it is real connection as well as transformation. There are still challenges as I faced living with an ostomy, the biggest one is the mental challenge. I work on this daily to slow my thoughts down, get out of my head, as well as hold gratitude close to my heart.
My advice for anyone living with any disability or learning need is to embrace all that is you and engage in support to get you to move your focus from what you don't have to what you want in life. Even in the conflict, challenge and disruption life gives us, we are remarkable human beings and that should be embraced.
Email to enquire for me to speak or sit on a panel discussion
- Empowerment - Overcoming adversity
- Empowerment - Finding purpose
- Professional standards - Bring life to the policies & procedures
- Mental Health and Well-Being
- Trauma and Trauma-Informed Approaches
- Community Engagement - Building and trust starts within
- Celebratory Speech - Milestones are for celebrating
- Youth Empowerment - finding yourself through your adversity
- Coaching and Mentoring
Here I was speaking to a room of new police recruits and trying to get them to understand that when you are called to serve, you serve all members of the public, both victims or perpetrators. Equally, if you treat people well then when they are not victims, then you don't damage the relationship with the public. Trust is not given, it's earned. When we understand this, our sectors have a chance to improve.
